daozhangs | ic inbox, ryslig.

[ Runyu knows that the day to honor friends is a little further into the month, but he has chosen to send his gifts early, in order to not overburden Jongdae the harpy and to keep from overshadowing any better gifts. There is also a small chance he will forget as he carved them in the woods earlier in the year. For another holiday. The reason doesn't matter. This way is simpler.

Most are carried off to places away from his home, but there is no need to deliver this one. It is the small tribute he has created for his housemate. Placing the bundle at his friend's doorway, he turns away for his usual stroll in the woods. A decent excuse to escape the initial backlash if he's somehow done something wrong. He has so little information or experience in this sort of thing.

If Xingchen notices the bundle, it's a letter wrapped around a small wooden frog.

The letter is short and pressed on the page with thicker lines of ink than usual to make reading easier on his friend. ]

Xingchen,

It has come to my attention that there is an upcoming holiday for giving gifts. It is a good opportunity for me to take the time to bestow the gratitude you deserve for your generosity to myself. I'm glad we met when I arrived in this realm and I hope I can be some source of strength for you as you have been for me.

I carved this in the woods. It is something of a past time I've developed over time and one of the few skills I can call my own. I hope it will share some of its freedom with you. Some rules are written into the heart of this world but there is a limit to the need for suffering because of them. Your identity is not shaped by them.

If I have said too much, please forgive my impertinence.

Runyu

[ The figure rests easily in the center of his hand and the wood has been roughly smoothed away. It is the general shape of a frog crouched with attention to the shape of its feet, both on the sides and on the bottom, and carefully shaving away edges on the head He has cut some rough impressions of texture on the back, too. It is not the best work he has done but hopefully it is enough.

( by the time runyu returns, the house is empty - xingchen is out for the afternoon, making a brief trip into the city to refresh some of their supplies before the fog makes cityfaring more dangerous.

but the frog and letter alike are both gone, and on the modest dining table sits a letter of his own, on which sits a small cloth pouch. the letter is written in vivid blue ink, but in a precise and practiced script. )

Runyu, my dear friend,

Of course you haven't said too much. On the contrary, it feels as though your words have brightened both my morning and some of the dim and dusty corners of my soul.

The frog is lovely, and I plan to cherish it a truly embarrassing amount. I hadn't known that you were skilled in carving. I suppose we don't speak often of such things as hobbies and pastimes, do we? But I like learning such things about you, and if you have any more such arts or activities, I'd enjoy hearing of them.

I still insist, as I always have, that you owe me no gratitude. Your presence has warmed this home far more effectively than the fireplace and I could have managed by ourselves.

You are already a source of strength, my friend. You have been strong since the day we first met, and I won't hear otherwise. If anything, my true hope is that you find it in yourself to allow that strength to rest. Your thoughts are so terribly loud, did you know? I worry and ache for you, but I'm never quite sure if it lies within my power to help quiet them.

Perhaps my own gift is a start.

Xingchen

(A post-script, I've realized I'm not at all sure what color this ink might be. If I've written to you in bright pink or some sort of vivid yellow-green, please forgive my transgressions against your eyes.)

( inside the pouch is a hand-carved 24-character charm, both faces of which are covered in the hanzi '息'. if their native written languages are at all similar, runyu will recognize that it means 'rest' and 'breathe'. )

( xingchen returns to the home an hour or so before sunset, arms full of groceries, a poorly-concealed smile tugging at the corners of his lips. he's only just remembered what he left to be discovered, you see, and there's a sort of delight in a well-orchestrated surprise. )

My friend, I've brought groceries, ( he calls in through the kitchen, carefully hefting the bags up onto the countertop now. ) I hope I correctly recalled you enjoying that cider from the market, since you now have quite a bit of it. ( granted 'quite a bit' by xingchen's standards is 'one standard-sized jug'. )

Edited 2021-02-19 11:27 (UTC)

[ Runyu exits from his bedroom where he has retreated after receiving Xingchen’s own gift, reading it at least three more times while rubbing the coin between his fingers.

Gifts remain a rare treasure, more like sea glass than pearls.

He’s never expected to earn another.

It is the third time he’s received such a thoughtful gift. The first two opportunities will always remain shrouded in the anguish of the guilt for his lost love, moments of warmth that condemned him when taken away. Perhaps his brother Xufeng may have made such an effort if he had asked but that would have brought more of the Empress’ attention to him than what he had already bore with. Yet when he had accepted the small gestures before, they were special, enough for him to hide the details from the Empress, even with his father’s promptings, and enough for him to spread the moon flowers around his quiet palace, even when the fairy who had gifted them to him was bloodying herself for another man.

And Xingchen’s gift is the most selfless of the three. To rest. Nothing for his friend but his own peace.

Runyu tucks the coin and the cord holding it back under his shirt.

It will be difficult, but perhaps because of all the work that he’s put into the present, Runyu holds the wish in the coin as close as Xingchen professes he will the frog.

Because his friend has given him a reason to try.

He laughs quietly at the question before responding, tone brighter than it’s been in years. ]

I did like it, but it would be even better in company. You can rest your hands after working so diligently for other’s comforts.

( honestly, xingchen's not at all sure who he was fooling with his useless attempts not to smile - the brightness in runyu's tone has the smile blooming again all by itself, let alone the confirmation that he's recalled correctly or the invitation which follows. but he's dutifully shaking his head a bit, because - ) I can rest once I've put these away. The goods in this realm are so terribly fussy about temperature. ( it's not as though food doesn't spoil, in his own realm, but not like this. food created with the convenience of refrigeration in mind.

in the meantime, he begins to unpack the bags, setting the cider aside in runyu's general direction in case he'd like to examine it. it occurs to him now that these larger grocery trips may not be quite so common soon - his friend's own monstrous hunger should emerge in the coming month as well, should it not? then neither of them will have need for 'human foods', though xingchen does still enjoy them regardless. )

Edited 2021-02-20 06:33 (UTC)

[ Runyu ignores the cider for now and helps sort the groceries that are mostly for his benefit, enjoying the warm silence of work that settles between them for a few seconds. But the letter and the coin resting on his heart has him in a rare mood. He doesn't stay silent long. ]

Then we should hurry. If left to our own devices, I'm not sure we're ones who would pay attention to those kind of details.

( though he wouldn't have minded putting the groceries away on his own, xingchen had been fairly sure such help would be offered. it typically is, to the point where they've gotten quite efficient at getting through housework or cooking or whatever else without having to strategize aloud or tripping over one another in the process.

the teasing at their own expense earns an amused little huff of breath, and - ) Certainly not. Especially not once you've sampled the cider.

[ Runyu lets out a small strangled gasp, a half-hearted attempt to hide his own rising amusement. When was the last time he's allowed himself a moment to banter like this? He turns to his friend, head tilting slightly, and eyes devious. ]

Perhaps. But I did tell you that I don't lose to spirits easily. It may be you who will forget the order of things.

Edited 2021-02-20 07:22 (UTC)

( his own remark is rewarded quite generously with a choked little gasp, a sign that such teasing hadn't quite been expected. xingchen had almost forgotten what it was like to banter with someone who isn't yet accustomed to such lapses in his seemingly-endless courtesy.

'it may be you who will forget the order of things.' ) If I'm to share in a drink? Most assuredly. Things, places, words, perhaps even decorum if I'm especially unlucky. ( he isn't even going to pretend otherwise, at this point. at the very least, runyu should know what it is that he's getting into. ) I've far more experience combating restless spirits than liquid ones.

[ Runyu wags a finger in his friend's direction. ]

Well I'm not drinking on my own in your house, so now's the time to practice unless you want to hear me crow at the moon from the forest.

[ He laughs again. He means it in a figurative sense. Runyu doesn't recall ever becoming a loud drunk or even a wandering drunk the few times he's allowed himself to drink into happy oblivion. But the notion has stuck. Runyu can't help but wonder what Xingchen would be like. ]

( though he can't see the waggling finger, runyu's tone conveys the same sentiment quite clearly. his words, meanwhile, have xingchen's smile spreading into an amused little grin, because - ) You know, I think you've just talked me back out of it.

( he hasn't, not really, but he should know how fantastically tempting it is once it's put quite like that. )

[ The smile keys Runyu in on the truth that Runyu's little slip hasn't offended Xingchen and Runyu exhales a bit, barely realizing how badly that could have been taken. How drastic a stumble that could be. Mercifully, Xingchen hasn't taken it as an insult.

Runyu sits at the table and set his head on his arms with a little smile.

If I am going to be honest with you, dear friend, the worst you'll probably hear from me is a snore. I tend to sleep at the table in those rare moments.

[ There is a subconscious lilt, nearly an inquiry in his last words, as if wishing that something isn't as fleeting in his current company. Is it the freedom to drop all defenses and pass away in fellowship or something more simple here? To continue joking like this without any walls between them? ]

( though by now he has grown somewhat attuned to many of runyu's subtleties, what lies beneath the lilt in his inflection eludes xingchen still. he'll likely wonder over it in the quiet moments between now and whenever the cider takes hold of his conscious thoughts - but for now, he just tilts his head slightly. )

You seem dangerously close to doing so now. ( don't think he hasn't noticed that voice coming from distinctly lower than runyu's typical upright posture, though whether his chin is propped on his hands or lying on folded arms can't quite be discerned. the last couple of groceries are going into the fridge now, and then xingchen steps over to join him at the table.

there's a moment's silence, enjoying his first little bit of rest after the day's activity and mulling over the possibility of teasing runyu just a bit more. his friend seems to delight in it, as much as he sometimes tries (and fails) not to show it. but his hands settle now on the table in front of him, right where he left the letter and gift before heading out for bavan, and instead what comes out is a quiet, )

Did you like it?

[ Runyu's smile grows and he nods with a low hum. He isn't sleepy or exhausted, as it may first appear to his dear friend, but more relaxed than he has been in countless years. He's even reverted to his old reclining pose. He lifts his head from its resting place to respond. ]

It is a very honorable gift and I will treasure it about the same silly way you will the frog. I hope you didn't injure your hands.

( for whatever it might be worth, xingchen had every intention of receiving whatever answer his friend might offer with some degree of self-restraint. that effort, however, goes right out the window when runyu says that he'll treasure it. an undeniable delight blooms so suddenly across his face that he's lifting his joined hands to prop on his elbows simply so he has something to hide his foolish smile behind.

ah, but speaking of his hands, runyu asks after them in the very next breath. xingchen shakes his head a bit, though he takes a moment to temper his smile just a bit before allowing said hands to return to the table so that he might speak. ) Nothing which hasn't already healed over. ( a beat, and then, ) I had the thought to have it enchanted by Mana so that it might function as it would have in my own realm.

[ Runyu can barely hold back his own silly smile at his friend's joy and it doesn't fade with his question. It's such an honorable effort on Xingchen's part, but truthfully, this step is unnecessary. Usually, he would retreat behind the courtesy of being unworthy, and a part of him acknowledges that truth still; however, that is not the reason for denying his friend this now.

He shakes his head with a light laugh. ]

That's alright, Xingchen. I don't need that kind of benediction. The thought already carved on it has more than enough power already. I do not want to belittle that. ( His hand lifts to rest on the coin. ) Mana's powers should be used for your comfort after giving me something like this. I do not need anything else.

[ The thought behind each carved stroke is already stronger than any wish he has received on his behalf. ]

Edited 2021-02-20 12:11 (UTC)

( at the laugh, his lips flicker again at the corners, but he manages to abstain from any more foolish grinning for now. instead, he listens as runyu declines the offer, entirely prepared to argue back that it's no trouble at all, and that runyu's peace of mind is far more important than whatever other use he might come up with for said coins - but all at once, he's distracted by the shift of runyu's hand.

since losing his sight, xingchen has grown quite used to the general presence of the unknown - little things (gestures, actions) which others do around him that aren't immediately pressing - which his mind mercifully no longer strives to comprehend. he has gotten quite skilled in parsing the relevant from the trivial, and from decidedly not allowing himself to wonder over what it was that he missed. and this, the quiet movement of runyu's hand, is likely trivial and indecipherable alike... but something about it catches inexplicably in the center of his chest and refuses to be dismissed so easily. it's just that the timing of the gesture and the placement of his hand left xingchen with a the fleeting picture of his charm as a pendant, not tucked away safely into a pocket like he'd thought. but he's probably incorrect - and it isn't as if he can ask, regardless. and so, with practiced care, he dislodges the notion from his mind and his chest to brush it aside with the rest of the unknown.

but it isn't entirely gone. there's a lingering hum of warmth in the spot in his chest, one which allows him to set down his vigilance just this once and offer a quiet but definitive, ) Alright. ( alright, he'll take runyu at his word that the coin will work as intended even in its current state. he'll trust that this isn't just a thing being said to deflect nay further effort on runyu's behalf. the smile returns, softer now than the delight of a minute ago. ) Alright, no enchantment for now.

Edited 2021-02-21 16:47 (UTC)

[ Runyu's smile doesn't fade as he lowers his hand back to the table. It isn't as if he's hiding that the coin has been made into a protective charm, but explaining the reasoning behind doing so is putting too much effort on personal gain. That doesn't mean that he will deny it if his friend finds out. He tilts his head again, recalling the letter that had accompanied the coin and the question about hobbies. ]

It seems I wasn't the only one surprised by a talent today. Is metalworking something you learned as a daozhang?

Edited 2021-02-22 06:29 (UTC)

( the question isn't one bit surprising, all things considered. though xingchen isn't one to consider his blindness a factor in what he is or isn't capable of, he does rationally recognize how unlikely such a skill probably seems with that in mind. )

Yes and no, ( he says, sitting up a bit now in his chair as if to settle in for an actual conversation, one hand thoughtlessly reaching for his cup of tea - but ah, that's right, just this once they've not prepared any. distracted by the banter and the concept of cider, almost certainly. but it has him standing now, hovering beside the table to say, ) Shall I prepare tea, or are we opening your cider?

( regardless of which one runyu chooses, he continues his answer as he fetches/prepares it. ) When I was a delightful young overachiever, I had the thought to craft my own spiritual blade. ( the amused lilt to his words suggests that this notion was entirely foolish. ) I proved quite ill-suited to smithing, and put the matter aside at the time. But a couple of years passed and I found myself away from my home for the first time in my recollection, faced with the matter of gathering currency for food. I was quite aware of currency, you see, but I hadn't yet dealt in it myself. But I came upon a merchant selling coin-charms much like yours, but for wealth and prosperity, for protection, for- virility, ( another note of amusement, because he distinctly recalls asking what such a thing means, to the utmost entertainment of everyone within earshot. ) But the prices... One coin-charm cost more than two weeks' meals, and they held so little qi that I had to touch one to feel it at all. I couldn't understand it. I could make the same thing for far cheaper, and could make certain my charms would work as they claimed to.

( by now, he has either put on a pot of tea and gathered a pair of mugs or fetched the cider and... probably still two mugs, let's be real - and he's returning to the table now to set the spoils between them. ) It took me entirely too long to accept that the road to starvation is paved with coin-charms sold at a reasonable price. The merchants chased me out of town, understandably, and I never quite returned to forging coins - apart from special occasions, I suppose.

[ Runyu takes a moment to deliberate on the choices set before him, smiling a little lopsided grin after as he lets his whims rule, and asks for both, keeping tea available to temper the cider if that is their wish. Whether or not they will become drunk this evening remains to be seen but he’s enjoyed the warmth of spirits nonetheless. He pours them both half a mug of the cider, and returns to his seat, setting his chin back on his hand as he listens to the remainder of Xingchen’s story, the kettle of tea hissing in the background.

There is much to learn from the story and much for Runyu to envy. It entirely escapes him that Xingchen has grown up as an orphan and with very little; it’s the spontaneity in his life that has him listening closely with a dazed expression on his face. He is far from unhappy. It’s the warm longing he’s felt most of his life, another expression tailored from years of observing other’s lives and knowing his will always be different. The dream of forging his own blade is nothing short of wondrous, brave and silly at the same time, and there’s no bitterness in his words about failing to keep making coins the proper way. This is a piece of his friend’s history but also another glimpse of freedom.

A small chuckle escapes him as he picks up the cider. ]

Well this one won’t chase you out if you wish to keep making them as long as you don’t hurt yourself too much. It’s a noble gift, after all.

( both it is, then. in that case, xingchen came back with the cider once he set the water to boil, cider and just the two cups for now - he'll grab another pair for the tea once that's ready as well.

in truth, xingchen hadn't intended to embrace any particular spontaneity. he had left the mountain quite deliberately and with every intent to plan responsibly for each new choice he made. the trouble with such a thing was how terribly difficult it is to plan for survival in a world which is all but unknown. none who left the mountain returned, after all, so who but baoshan sanren herself could have taught him? so what seems very much like spontaneity in retrospect was simply ignorance and improvisation. it truly is astoundingly fortunate that he encountered zichen quite so early in his journey, as he was already well on his way down the path to learning each and every one of the world's many lessons firsthand.

xingchen doesn't yet touch his own cider even once his tale is done - but unlike the cup which he foisted onto runyu at the festival, in this case it's simply the restlessness of attentive hosting, awaiting the whistle of tea so that he can serve that as well before he allows himself to rest.

and whistle it does before long, though it almost seems to wait just barely long enough to politely allow runyu to finish his words. words which have xingchen exhaling a smile, but he shakes his head as he stands again to fetch the tea. ) I've made all that I needed, ( he says, as simple as that. runyu has his coin and jiang wanyin has his own - what need would xingchen have to forge any more of them? perhaps if jiang wanyin's sister remained in this realm, he might have crafted her one as well, one more sliver of protection from a realm which seeks to eat each of them alive and to make them do the same.

but as he sets the tea to steep, something else seems to occur to him regarding runyu's assurance, and he huffs out an almost-laugh and asks, ) As long as I don't hurt myself too much. Does that mean you will be chasing me off if I do?

[ Runyu nearly chokes on the cider at his friend's joke, coughing and then grinning afterwards as he lets his throat clear. This side of Xingchen is like wind from the water's edge, filling the former immortal with contentment and overpowering the pale heat of the spirits in the cider. There's a pleasure in it that Runyu wishes will linger on after the fleeting evening. ]

That's rather cruel of me, kicking my host out of his own house for being too good of a person. What will the neighbors think?

[ He takes a moment to recover his wits, considering a further response as his friend prepares the tea.

But it doesn't take him overlong. There is no competition here. ]

I'll be taking your tools until you've learned to behave at the very least. Maybe bury them in the garden where you won't be able to get to them without disturbing the worn out vegetables.

( though neither quite realize it, their sentiments at the moment aren't quite so different. just as runyu finds himself refreshed by the jokes and the teasing, xingchen delights in his ability to do so. he feels incrementally lighter with each new facet of joy or amusement warming his friend's own words, most certainly reward enough to continue his teasing as long as he's able.

but - 'maybe bury them in the garden where you won't be able to get to them without disturbing the worn out vegetables.' xingchen has just set the steaming teapot on the table, and at these words he stops short before setting the new pair of mugs down as well, mouth falling open in delighted affront. ) But - then you've disturbed them! You can disturb them but I can't disturb them? That's hardly fair.

[ This time Runyu's ready for some kind of quip and has his cup lowered but Xingchen's mock outrage is even bette than he anticipated. A devious smirk lights up his face. ]

Well maybe someone who can handle them properly should. Really, Xingchen, you're a man of mystery. You know how to make coins but not how to put a few plants into the ground?

The plants are perfectly fine, ( xingchen argues back, but after a beat he adds, ) I think. ( they each get a mug for the tea now, and he's sinking back into his chair. ) I've not tended a garden before, so I suppose I wouldn't really know whether they're fine or not.

( meanwhile, just as he'd thought he heard, runyu has poured him some cider as well - the faint spiced-fruit scent of it wafts up from his prior mug, colored faintly with the darker undertone of fermentation. a flicker of anxiety darts up from the base of his spine, but xingchen sternly swallows it down. perhaps his last experience with spirits here as a were- was fraught, but he has learned quite a bit from that - about not drinking such things in public places, about various means by which to affect his otherwise-involuntary shifts, and about trusting those whom he's close to in case the worst does occur. and so, after a quiet considering hum, he lifts the cider to his lips to take a drink.

it's different, certainly, from that which he has tasted before. both times he has had any manner of alcohol were at some manner of alcohol-serving establishment in the city, whether bavan or felfri, and their drinks had been flavorful and pleasant but also carried a distinctly artificial taste. this cider, however, truly does taste like fermented spiced apple juice - a fact which he enjoys and finds disconcerting in equal measures, as a man who has lived in just enough scarcity to keep vigilant for the taste of fermentation in the past. but it's a reflex he can certainly overcome, because the flavor of it is genuinely delicious, enough so that he's already stealing another sip. ) I hadn't thought that the Night Immortal would have the time to learn to tend a garden. ( he knows very little about the title, but for the fact that it seemed like quite a weight on his shoulders. he spoke of the heavenly realm, of emperors and thrones, and the notion of him settling down to put plants in the dirt just doesn't quite fit that picture in xingchen's mind. )

Edited 2021-02-23 05:16 (UTC)

That’s a good question.

[ Runyu chuckles, smile dimming. He lowers his glass of cider, lacing it between his two hands and takes a minute to gather his thoughts. Truthfully, his experience in gardening is limited, arguably comparable to his friend’s, but that brief interlude remains something special. Even connected to the woman he betrayed on so many levels, he can’t cut the opportunity away. Perhaps it’s the moments connected to that bloom that he empathizes with, naive words followed by forgotten promises, struggling on his own in darkness alone, appearing invisible even when putting forth the effort. ]

Maybe I shouldn’t tease you about them. Really, they remind me of a flower gifted me long, long ago. It’s just the one time but I couldn’t fail. ( He shakes his head. )What was another challenge set before me to master alone without any guidance? Although, if I had taken it that way, perhaps it wouldn’t matter now. Be that as it may, I watched it grow from a tiny warm seed in a pouch to a sprout into plant ready to shine like the stars I envied above. It was my first flower. ( He snorts gently, reprimanding himself, and lifts his cup, taking a longer drink of the cider, supporting the ache that’s risen. ) Perhaps- ( He lowers the cider, a whimsical smile rising over his features, letting the words form as they never have before. ) Perhaps that is when I fell in love with her. And when I lost her.

WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, XIAO.XINGCHEN. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 018.07.154.55 * XIAO.XINGCHEN has joined 018.07.154.55 <XIAO.XINGCHEN> You have reached Xiao Xingchen. <XIAO.XINGCHEN>** I am often away from my laptop, but I will do my best to answer as soon as I'm able.

A bundle left behind - dated back to February 12th

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