ic inbox, ryslig.

[daozhangs]

WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, XIAO.XINGCHEN. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 018.07.154.55 *** XIAO.XINGCHEN has joined 018.07.154.55 <XIAO.XINGCHEN> You have reached Xiao Xingchen. <XIAO.XINGCHEN> I am often away from my laptop, but I will do my best to answer as soon as I'm able.

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[daozhangs]

( xingchen has no doubt that it does look painful, though it doesn't quite feel like proper pain. that which a lich does isn't truly a burn, not even the acidic sort, and amidst the scattering of pain is a sort of incorrectness in sensation, like a radio's static put to flesh. this, too, has healed quite a bit since the incident - and even when it was fresh, he would hardly have called the pain and such 'suffering' regardless of how jiang wanyin might see it.

the brush of fingertips comes later than expected, and somewhat lighter than perhaps is necessary (the raised areas which receive the most attention also retain the least sensation, and wanyin certainly isn't seeking out the reddened recesses which burn a bit more to the touch), but xingchen allows his husband to examine the affliction at his own pace and in whichever manner he chooses. when those explorative fingertips eventually intertwine with his, he gives a light squeeze and slides his thumb along the back of jiang wanyin's. )

Perhaps on such inevitable occasions, ( he murmurs, a return smile curling his own lips at the corners ) you might endeavor to delight me enough that more good comes of it than bad. ( more good than bad by wanyin's own standards, even, since xingchen knows all too well that his husband wouldn't allow them to judge by xingchen's own own significantly higher threshold for discomfort or pain. )

[legbreakings]

Only you would say such a thing [ Jiang Cheng exclaims, somehow managing to sound thoroughly exasperated and deeply fond all at the same time. It's true, though, he can't imagine anyone else bluntly speaking of him alone being enough of a delight to make up for a terrible disaster like having his arm melting away. It's frustratingly optimistic and terribly loveable all at once, and the smile with which it comes makes his heart flutter in the most ridiculous manner. ] You're so... You.

[ He shakes his head in amused amazement but then that smile of his softens and the hand not entangled with Xingchen's reaches for his chin, cupping it gently as he leans in to brush a kiss to his lips. ] Thank you [ he whispers and decides to trust Xingchen will know how many things he is thanking him for, even if he finds it harder to speak bluntly of his feelings.

On the other hand, Xingchen does speak very openly with him... and that reminds him of the other thing he intended to do visiting today. Far less pleasant than fussing over him. He does so hate to worry him, but not telling him about the upcoming mission for the Fourth would be cruel both if he learns it from him only afterward and even more so if something goes wrong and he learns it from someone else. Better to worry him now. He clears his throat awkwardly. ] But there is another thing you need to know.

[daozhangs]

( to say that his arm has been melted away feels like a terrible exaggeration. his arm is almost entirely intact, if distinctly uncomfortable (and disconcerting to look at). xingchen would also like to think that he isn't the only one who would say what he did - that others, like him, seek the light and the joy in this place rather than simply resigning themselves to the pain of it - if only because the thought that he might be the only one is indescribably disheartening.

but it wasn't a comment intended for such deep consideration. it was an expression of adoration, and the fondness within it sweeps away any semblance of serious consideration like a warm summer tide. xingchen isn't even entirely sure what he's done to earn such incredulity, or how this was any different from that which jiang wanyin has come to expect of him - but it has won him terribly sweet little kiss, so perhaps it's best not to question his good fortune. to the 'thank you,' his throat forms by reflex the hum that might typically convey something like 'of course, airen', though of course it comes out more like the croak of a well-mannered frog. this, xingchen will trust his husband to understand, just as wanyin has done for him. (and he does, most certainly. perhaps xingchen doesn't know specifically what the gratitude is for, but in all likelihood, neither does jiang wanyin. how silly it would be, to try to pick it apart into identifiable pieces, wasting time that they might otherwise spend on such things as kissing again.)

as it turns out, no further kissing is to be had - at least not just yet. instead, wanyin's tone has gone serious, holding himself with a new sort of tension that he may not even quite notice... but xingchen does, of course. just as before, he strokes the back of his husband's thumb with his own, wordlessly soothing despite not yet knowing what for.

'but there is another thing you need to know.' with a slight tilt of his head, ) I'm listening. ( his free hand locates his tea all the while and brings the cup to his lips for a leisurely sip, an idle gesture steeped in normalcy to perhaps diffuse a bit of the unease. )

[legbreakings]

It is... [ Jiang Cheng momentarily abandons fussing over Xingchen's arm to go and fiddle with his cup of tea, never mind that there are only drops remaining in it. But it is something else to keep his hands busy while he figures out how to bring up this topic, and means he can look at the tabletop instead of meeting Xingchen's eyes.

This might hurt Xingchen, it might upset him, and he so hates to cause such feelings but... ]

I will be working on something in a couple of days, for the Fourth God. There is a mission, and when they asked for volunteers, I offered my services. They don't have many fighters, and if things turn ugly that could make a difference. [ None of which makes this sound particularly trust-inspiring, he realizes as he speaks, so he hastens to reassure, ] But it is very unlikely to turn violent. Things would have to go very wrong for that to happen. We mean to cause no harm. I just... [ He looks rolls the cup around in his hands some more. ] I wanted you to know. So you don't think I'm hiding things from you unnecessarily. I didn't want to speak of it on the laptop but there is no harm in speaking of it in person with someone I trust.

[daozhangs]

( if it helps, he wouldn't be meeting xingchen's gaze - merely looking at where it tends to be. had all of this come a fortnight later, perhaps xingchen might have been able to call forth his sight without inviting some manner of burrowing ache in the depths of his eyeless hollows, but for now, he has fallen back on well-worn sightless habits. in truth, he might very well have done so still if he could see. watching jiang wanyin as he speaks would do his unease no particular favors, not when xingchen can listen just as attentively with his not-gaze resting somewhere in the vicinity of wanyin's tea, his own teacup lowering to quietly settle once again on the tabletop.

but soon the confession(?) is through, and even though he has taken in every word, xingchen can't help but feel as though he has missed something. specifically, he has missed whichever facet of this fairly confession has warranted such hesitation or uncertainty. did wanyin think him so likely to protest this work for his chosen god? they had known such a thing was a facet of pledging oneself to a god in the first place.

and so first he offers a muted hint of a smile, a murmured: ) I'm glad that you've told me. ( a beat of pause, of consideration, and: ) What is it that you seek to do?

[legbreakings]

[ He exhales in a whoosh, relieved that Xiao Xingchen isn't reacting badly to the news. Curious, but not badly. Curious, he can handle, at least to some extent. ] There is only so much I know [ he admits, a little sheepishly. It's embarrassing to admit to such ignorance, and yet... ] I have only just pledged myself to the Fourth God. I don't want to demand too many explanations or details, for fear that they believe I'm trying to spy on them for the Fog.

[ He nudges his empty cup around on the table, simply to keep his hands busy. ]

We want some of these vacuums, with which the Haftesal people suck up the fog. There is still a chance we can negotiate with Haftesal for them, and we won't need to steal them. [ A moment's pause, another sigh. ] Although it will be safer for Haftesal if it is at least believed that we took them by force. If this should turn public opinion against us, with so many monsters owing the Haftesal scientists for curing the flower disease, then it is a small price to pay for their safety.

[daozhangs]

( and all of this is certainly sound enough in concept, but at the same time, it raises nearly as many questions as it answers - most notably why exactly they need to take said vacuums when haftesal already seems to use them to the benefit of those who oppose the fog. xingchen is far from cynical by nature, but he has learned by now the dangers inherent in mistaking the best of intentions for the best of outcomes. if they intend to steal the fog vacuums from haftesal, does it mean that they intend to use them more boldly than haftesal has? have they considered the potential for harm in pushing these devices past the limits which the devices' actual creators have held themselves to?

it's a question which jiang wanyin likely doesn't know the answer to, and one which would certainly overstep his position to challenge the others with at this stage if it were brought to his attention. so xingchen holds his tongue, though his husband can no doubt sense the churning of his thoughts by now. instead, once the explanation is finished, he offers a simple: ) I agree. ( it's closer to proper volume and little more than a crackle because of it, but he maintains that crackle for the remainder of his response: ) I'm relieved that they've planned to avoid harm to Haftesal. ( as much as he, subjectively, would prefer that public opinion not villainize jiang wanyin, a man's choices have consequences, and haftesal should not be left to shoulder them for the crime of innovation. )

[legbreakings]

[ There are many questions he could be asking about this mission, but Jiang Cheng has plenty of experience not letting himself think too closely about things which are better left unexamined.

So all he does is nod, accompanied by a tiny smile. ] I'm glad for it, too. They have done us a great kindness with the flower disease. We owe them. [ he takes Xingchen's hands into his own again and gives them a tight squeeze. ] I owe them, for saving your life.

[ If that comes at him facing the scorn of others, well, that won't be anything new either. He will only hope that Xingchen isn't affected for his ties to him. ]

But let us not think about that anymore now. Let us find something more pleasant to do. We could take a walk, maybe, if you are feeling up to it. The forest is nice around this time of the year.