daozhangs | ic inbox, ryslig.

[ There has been an alarming amount of activity on the other side of the trash barricade around Kulen and Jiang Cheng finds himself unable to forget the suggestion someone on the network had made. The investigation part anyway. Even if he remains sceptical of the sabotage suggestion that came with it. ]

Have you wondered what is happening in Kulen right now?

[ Just a short message, a conversation snippet sent off over the course of the day. He has grown used to sharing his thoughts. ]

Context

[ When pain subsides and he uncurls from his fetal position to find a figure standing before him on the other side of the room, Runyu’s mind fills with fatalistic thoughts. Turning his head away, his hands clench into fists. He's not ready to walk with another ghost from his past. The hollow emptiness left in the wake of his scars still swallow him up. ]

( A voice, all too familiar, calls over, the temperance in the tone stalling Runyu's panic.) Runyu, it’s alright.

[ Runyu’s head snaps upwards, eyes narrowed as fear turns to brooding suspicion.

However, a figure in blue robes only smiles and bows to him, his hair tied back with a simple white tie and a plum branch hairpin the emperor had almost forgotten. And when he rises, the figure’s eyes shine with warmth and patience.

Runyu stares, swallowing thickly, at the man — at the Night Immortal who has not allowed the darkness of immortality in to darken the soul that always watched the stars. ]

———

[ Runyu can not ignore this version of himself, nor can he bring himself to engage with him directly. Fortunately, that doesn’t seem to bother his doppleganger. In fact, after explaining that he will do Runyu no harm as long as he exists with him, the other version, Li (as they’ve agreed to call him) turns to exit their room.

Runyu dashes out after Li the moment he’s no longer in his sight, only able to hesitate for a moment before following. An awful pit of dread coils in his stomach, fearing the end even as the warm beginning unfolds before him. Still caught in the terror and suspicion that the darkness brought back into him after another glimpse of war.

Runyu doesn’t get far though. He’s rooted to the spot, to his bedroom’s threshold, when the doppleganger — when Li embraces Xingchen as he’s exiting his own room. Although, it is the words that echo in their small cabin that leave Runyu speechless. ]

I know I don’t make it easy for you, dear friend, but I don’t know how I could have adapted to life again without you.

[ Runyu takes a step back so he may listen but he’s separate. It’s a simple thing, blending in with his light green robes.

Those words are the fervent praises Runyu’s longed to give voice to for his friend but has yet been able to completely set free from the confines of his nightmares. The ability to say so much without worrying that he’s gone too far or will never be able to unsay them again — to embrace life in all its shades and let the silver lining shine through — is one he no longer possesses.

After the anguish from November, he acknowledges this. He understands that he may wish to breathe easier around Xingchen but there are still chains holding him back. He’s not yet at rest.

He reaches for the necklace and wonders if such a blessing would have been necessary. Would his double, Li, wear it as well? Perhaps, with his weakness, Runyu covets the necklace all the more, selfishly wishing that Li does not. ]

[ It has been days since Runyu woke to find the doppleganger that the gods here had bestowed him with. Days that had passed in a blur of steadfast interaction . . . . .

Li’s smile had killed the suspicion inside Runyu. And somewhere, the dread of the end had also faded away. An end would come, but for now, he would not ruin the moment given him. He would accept what he had.

And yet, Runyu hadn’t realized that he had cared for Li or that he had come to see his double not as an extension of himself but as something else. A brother he had never been allowed, even with Xufeng.

Runyu clenches at the folds of his robes, tears blurring his vision, stained red yet again, darkened with the life that had been torn asunder in his arms. Like his mother….

Is this the only fate allowed him? Even here, would he still . . . . . ]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!

[ The scream rips out of his throat, searing his windpipe and tearing at his vocal chords, the volume echoing ominously against his pounding eardrums. It's not enough. It couldn’t even begin to erase the fury and grief in this loss.

Li had been only an illusion.

But he's an illusion that came from within Runyu, somewhere when he still stood in the light despite the shadows clinging to him. ]

[ Runyu has attempted to remain neutral since his arrival in Ryslig. At first, it had been the weight of the chains, of his sins, that had kept him from becoming involved in the war. Fear of a second terrible miscalculation of his own strength. Similarities presented between himself and the Fog only gave more power to his creeping fear. But Runyu's vow to stay in this realm altered his stance. Whether or not he could gain the courage to choose a part in the schemes around him, he could no longer remain distant. And unknowing.

He has since started to gather the knowledge of both sides, starting with the follower of the Fog whom he believed to be forthright in his manner.

It is his discussion with Noa and the reason behind the sad dopplegangers that brings him to this text.

The timing also gives him something to focus on besides the false grief for his mirror image, the one he should have been. To still the urge to walk away again. ]

Xingchen, have you seen the network tape about this month?

[ In the aftermath of speaking with the Fourth God, Jiang Cheng had needed some time to think until he felt ready to truly talk about his hopes and fears - he had needed time to sort his thoughts out for himself at least in so far as that he even had the words to put them in. Thus, he had after his return basically only told Xingchen that it had went well and he had returned unharmed, but asked for time until he was ready to speak of what this might mean for his - or even their, though this remained unsaid - future.

It's late one evening while he is still reading in his study that he finally loses patience with his own circular thoughts. ]

It's funny, when I arrived I took such pride in choosing to follow neither local god.

[ The heist had gone off... well, not without a hitch (no thanks to you, Beat) but successful, which leaves Jiang Cheng with mostly something related but different on his mind: his husband, and what concerns he may be having.

He had warned him that he would be out of contact for most of the 8th and 9th but having been unable to dare tell him much in the way of details, he is well aware his secrecy and natural tendency to anxious worry may have given the impression that the entire heist is far more dangerous than it turned out to be.

He had always planned to make his way right to Xiao Xingchen's home when he returned from Haftesal, before even returning to Lotus Pier, and he feels acute relief now as the cabin comes into view. The garden is a sad sight still with the recent acid rain and he shakes his head, thinking briefly that they should garden together soon. But that is not here and now.

For now, he knocks, and hopes it will be his husband opening the door.

At least he has no wounds, though his purple robes have soaked up the burnt smell from the fire his teammate had caused, and Xingchen may be able to discern that these sleek robes worn with leather bracers are the style he wears for combat (or combat training, here in Ryslig) though he doesn't carry his sword. He also looks exhausted, and is still in his Simulacrum form, another sign of his exhaustion that he would suffer the discomfort of a body he hates for the greater endurance it gives him. ]

Edited 2022-03-18 19:43 (UTC)

Are you sure you are feeling well enough to do it yourself?

[ Jiang Cheng narrows his eyes at his husband, only by great force of will resisting the urge to hover over him and stay put sitting at his kitchen table while Xiao Xingchen is preparing their tea. He has been in a mood to hover ever since the surgery at Haftesal left him weakened, yet that need has only intensified with the upcoming heist.

There is no saying how this mission for the Fourth God will end - the plan is non-violent, but Jiang Cheng knows better than to expect plans to work out as intended, or not backfire. Not least, if they are outed, they may very well have to suffer whatever the consequences of public condemnation for attacking peaceful, monster-friendly Haftesal, and draw the ire of the Fog's followers onto themselves. It is a risk everyone involved in this operation is taking readily, as far as he knows, but... His eyes find Xingchen, and are quickly averted again. Well, he will only have to hope Xingchen won't take it too hard if it comes to that.

For now, all he can do is try to bask in the time together they have - well, this, and he still has to tell him he has decided to sign up. Something for after the tea is prepared, maybe. ]

I can help, you know. You could sit and let me take care of this. I would think we are well beyond you feeling the need to be a good host!

Edited 2022-03-19 16:29 (UTC)

Ni hao.

I wanted to ask about your arm. Is it okay?

I'm really, really, really sorry for what happened. If I can do anything to make it up to you, please let me know!!

Edited 2022-03-22 12:06 (UTC)

[ Runyu doesn’t linger in the hospital after Xingchen wakes up. It would be too easy to cling to him even after the initial exchange. Such a position belongs to Jiang Cheng’s as his partner and Runyu cannot bring himself to overstep the new boundaries he himself has imposed on Xingchen and himself. Even if they seem invisible to most eyes, they exist. So he returns home by air, taking the time in the currents to calm the vestiges of fear and blame that remained lodged in his throat.

At first, that’s all he believed his discomfort to be even with the first cough after landing.

High emotions often cause harm to his airways from breathing too fast and anxiety building up in his chest. He has never learned to process such desires without suffering some amount of distress. Back in his realm, he did not wish to stand out from the crowd or foist his weaknesses upon others. And even here, he could not be vulnerable.

Even now… when that is something he truly, truly wished he could allow himself, when in these walls of his dearest friend’s house, such training is too ingrained in him to let go.

After all, he remains brittle underneath the folds of his discipline. He has learned that the yearning to destroy, to hide behind the chaos, still lingers in him.

Runyu spends the next few hours in various activities to regain composure: tidying the house from the morning’s trauma, preparing new tea leaves, watering the plants, and sitting at the guqin in meditation. These are all activities with one goal in mind: to keep from returning to check on Xingchen — to let his emotions lay at the bottom the abyss that was his heart.

He ends the day by making another batch of tea for the evening. It matters little if he were here alone or not. It would be available without much fuss.

However, when pouring the water over the leaves, he starts as blood drips down into the cup. Lifting his free hand and covering his nose, he sets the kettle aside. An acidic tang flows into his mouth as he retreats to the bathroom, another cough escaping him.

There, as he pulls away the tissue, a familiar pattern laughs at him, the joyful face of pansy petals, in soaked bloody pieces. Lifting his eyes, the blood still dripping from his nose, Runyu smiles for a brief cold moment.

The timing is too convenient. The lie — what omission of truth — had taken root in his soul and is now climbing up his pathways is too obvious. He bends over to wipe his face, sighing as more pain blossoms between the hateful scales.

It would be too easy if he could escape. It would be too simple if he ran to the hospital where his friends may yet remain.

Tossing the cloth into the sink, he returns to the kitchen, for a knife to cut away more vegetation from his torso.

What time does he have? ]

Edited 2022-04-14 05:56 (UTC)

[ It's late when Xingchen receives a text, not yet midnight, but late enough that usually, Runyu would speak of this in person. But tonight, he's not home yet, resting in the top of a tree near the cabin after training and gazing at the faraway stars. ]

Does Jiang Cheng seem happy after joining Elias?

[ Runyu places the laptop in a nest he's crafted for it afterwards, just in case Xingchen responds. ]

Edited 2022-04-20 04:49 (UTC)

[ When she wasn't at work, Lanzhu had time to kill before she planned on heading home for the afternoon. After her errands, she had one last place to go-- to visit Xingchen. She was always a little sad thinking about how he didn't live with Jiang Cheng back at Lotus Pier, but there were things she had to keep her mouth shut about rather than meddle in their business. Nonetheless, she enjoyed heading out to visit and admire the help she had done on the flowers at his home.

Hooked around her arm was a little basket covered in a red cloth to conceal its contents. Not that she really had to, but she had to make everything pretty! Only the best for her "family". ]

Xingchen? Lanzhu's here for a visit if you aren't busy!

[ She bounced on her toes like her own idle animation, popping a smile to her lips as she gazed around. ]

Edited 2022-04-28 12:36 (UTC)

Good morning, Xingchen.

I'm sorry I didn't respond earlier, I left at sunrise to go swimming in the lake.

Have you made progress in mastering your new powers?

[One more heist wouldn't hurt him. That was what Altair thought when he decided to risk breaking in to one more house tonight. Or rather, invite himself inside. There was no breaking involved when you could just slip under the door. Unfortunately the ease of the heist made him sloppy and he didn't notice the guard until it was too late.

The guard waited until he had sunk into his puddle form before attacking him with a shock baton. Altair's cry of pain was muffled as if he was underwater. His puddle of slime rippled as Altair tried to reform himself so he could protect himself. It was harder to see this close to the ground so he had no idea what was happening. The volatile mix of his rage and fear helped him push through the pain, long enough for the top of his head with cat ears to peer out of slime.

Altair briefly saw a human looming over him before another shock broke up his shape and it splashed into the puddle of slime again. A muffled chuckle rippled through his slime, growing louder as Altair stubbornly started to reform again and the top of a cat like face taunted the guard with a defiant smirk.]

Well this is a surprise. You pathetic humans are actually competent at something.

[When the guard tried to shock him again, Altair shaped his reforming arm into a tentacle, hitting his attacker with all the strength his weakened body had. The attack caught the guard by surprise but Altair's body was still weak so all it did was startle him. In retaliation the guard continued to shock him over and over again, keeping him trapped inside his puddle. The puddle rippled with his muffled screams. The ripples getting weaker as he started to lose himself under the pain.]

Prior to the network post

I hate being a Simulacrum again.

I need to stop wasting time and find a manticore for the venom, preferably before Mana forgets that I have already paid her for this transformation.

Do you have any suggestions for catching these cats?

[ Waking up back in Felfri with his body human and his powers returned to him had been wonderful for all of the ten minutes it took Jiang Cheng for faithful GEEVES to give him a refresher course on how to use his cell phone - and find the message left there.

Relief had immediately given way to alarm, one only increased when he left the room he had woken up in and discovered just how large the facility he is in is. Large, with Xiao Xingchen nowhere to be found. ]

Xingchen! Xingchen, can you receive this message? Tell me where you are!

Are you hurt? Are you somewhere safe?

Sorry for going quiet. I asked GEEVES to send you a message that I'll contact you again later, but I'm not sure if he is actually capable of following such orders.

We had to respond to a call for help. But I'm in the transport back to base now. Everyone will be alright, no lost limbs or major injuries.

How is your day?

no cw for now, nsfw later down the road

[ The sparsely populated, large room is dark and hushed, only the flickering bright light from the front briefly illuminating it in sharp flashes of lightning. A child's terror-filled scream pierces through the quiet, felt all around them, like it is coming from everywhere at once.

Jiang Cheng jumps, Zidian sparking on his right even as he has it on Xiao Xingchen's thigh. His eyes flicker around, for a moment searching out a real threat before he, quietly cursing to himself, focuses his eyes on the large screen at the front of the room.

The ghost child's face is melting away like technicolor ice melting in Yunmeng's summers from the E+L-produced anti-ghost particle water (rainbow-colored and glittery) she had been drenched in and still, she keeps screaming until she no longer has a mouth to scream. ]

I don't think ghosts work like that anywhere [ Jiang Cheng grumbles, his voice maybe a little bit too loud, but fortunately they are all alone in the back row of the cinema, and there is nobody else sitting in the two rows ahead of them either.

The Many Hauntings of Buff Winters: A Found Footage Anthology had seemed like a good movie for their first movie date ever. Had. As in, past tense. The snarky hero's voiceover picks up again, talking about his extra steamy next case and Jiang Cheng interlaces his fingers with Xingchen's as he leans in close, whispering into his ear now. ] That must be the last one, it feels like we have been in here for hours. Let's get a drink after? There is a bar right down the street from E+LPlaza. I checked, they even have the colorful drinks with umbrellas.

I can't find her

WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, XIAO.XINGCHEN. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 018.07.154.55 * XIAO.XINGCHEN has joined 018.07.154.55 <XIAO.XINGCHEN> You have reached Xiao Xingchen. <XIAO.XINGCHEN>** I am often away from my laptop, but I will do my best to answer as soon as I'm able.

Text December 15th

Unspoken Words from the Heart -- Backdated to January 16 (Doppleganger Event)

Dying in Your Arms again - Backdated to January 22 (end of Doppleganger) [cw: grief]

Backdated to January 23 -- after event ends

backdated to early February

action, afternoon of march 9th

action, March 6th

< l'ange > dated to a week or so after Arm Meltinggate

Backdated to February 21 evening - end of Hanahaki event

Pushing the Boundaries of his Beliefs again - mid April

< action > pre-event

May 11th, text

backdated to mid June, before the event, cw: violence

August 5th, text